A tiny little self indulgent post

For the longest time, I felt lost. I had forgotten who I was, neglected to do the things that made me feel alive. I’d given so much of myself to those that demanded it that I was just a shadow of who I used to be. Even after I had let go of most of what weighed me down, I still didn’t know how to get back to being me. I couldn’t remember what it felt like and I had no idea where to look. Then one night, in a rare moment of freedome I drifted into a semi crowded room with a friend and there, while waiting for the band to set up, we heard the starting strains of a familiar Puddle of Mudd song. Sitting there on what was probably a packing case of some sort, we belted it out and as we got to the first chorus of she fucking hates me; I remembered what it felt like to be me. That was the small turning point i had needed. To feel alive again, to feel like yes, i can have theses small moments all to myself separate from the responsibility and mundanity i was drowning in. And now, hell, I’m just grateful to be back.